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Nokia
Ah, Nokia. The one everyone by now must have been waiting on. You should, with good reason, be waiting for me to treat Nokia as little more than a joke.
It’s almost got to the point where I feel sorry for Nokia. Don’t get me wrong – everything they’ve done has been their own stupid fault, but seeing the unusually unassuming Scandinavian faces at Nokia… It almost makes me think they came into the industry really, truly believing in their own hype. And now they’ve had that hype thrown back in their faces 100 times over, they’ve been humbled. And it’s been made clear from the GDC Mobile Day that mobile phone technology is moving so fast that the N-Gage is a case of a bad idea at a worse time. There’s nothing left but to pity them.
Indeed, the stand they had was far less in your face with the mad attitude than I had expected. While the “Tony Hawk’s Challenge” attempted a modicum of in-your-faceness, for the most part the demonstrators stood silently, almost forlornly, allowing people to play the games in the nearest to silence you can get on a tradeshow floor. Occasionally, they would offer mint packets in the shape of the N-Gage cartridges to people passing.
Launching at a £220 price point in the UK, and despite bullish reports in MCV that the phone would be offered in many stores for as little as £99 ($150) with service provider contracts, it now appears that only provider O2 will offer such a deal for the N-Gage. This leaves the already incredibly unstylish N-Gage almost completely out of the running as a phone upgrade to the average consumer.
But how do the games stand up? Could you seriously justify spending $299 to play these games?
Unequivocally, no.
Sonic (Sega) This is a major surprise after the alpha quality of the version on show at the EIGF. The game is now in full screen, and feels really nice and smooth. In fact, it’s easily the best game available in the library of N-Gage games.
Sadly, in my eyes, even if we ignore the terrible limitations of the N-Gage as a game platform (oh! The horrible buttons!) the game is yet another 2d Sonic. If you really want to play one of these on the move, then the 2 GBA iterations should serve the urge substantially. A 2d Sonic just cannot justify $299 alone.
Super Monkey Ball (Sega) In the ‘Great Mobile Game Design’ lecture at the GDC, we observed the pre-alpha version of this being played, and it looked way, way worse than the GBA version. However, it did allow many of us to observe the changing of a N-Gage cartridge for the first time. Ouch. If you are incredibly dexterous, you could possibly manage it standing up without a workspace. Sitting it on your knees might work, also.
I imagine the designers didn’t think that this would be a problem, as many people would leave one game in the machine at least for the duration of whatever journey they are taking. It’s a possibility. But making more or less impossible to have the option of changing carts on the move just to stop the piracy of downloaded games… Seems ill-thought out.
But Super Monkey Ball! Actually, this version is near complete now, and in far better nick than the pre-Alpha, or even, dare I say it, the GBA version, which was so skilfully translated by Realisim. And had the N-Gage any semblance of analogue control, this could be fantastic, as it’s exactly the sort of game that lends itself to having a quick go (or even leaving in the machine for weeks on end, heh) but… It’s just not playable, and even less so than the GBA version which still managed to grasp some subtlety from the digital controls.
This version is more faithful in design than the GBA version, and does contain versions of the party games, in cut down forms. But it’s not enough to save it.
Puyo Puyo (Sega) Oh man! It’s Puyo Puyo! Just about the only game on show which didn’t feel hard to control due to the N-Gage’s design, the multiplayer game was massively pleasurable. In looks it reminded me strongly of the NGPC version, which I already own and love to death, making this, a game that’s only interesting feature on the N-Gage is that you’re playing it… ON A PHONE!
If you could find other N-Gage equipped players that own the title, the multiplayer is such a blast that it would easily be worth it. But if you don’t already own a copy of this, you’ve got to be some kind of insane puzzle game hatin’ fool.
Tomb Raider (Eidos) This feels and looks exactly like the Playstation original, but is completely hampered by the fact that every function is mapped across the keypad, making skilful movement and combat far more cumbersome than you would hope. It’s… Okay, I guess, but not exciting at all. Again, it all comes down to exactly how desperate you are to play this game… ON A PHONE!
Tony Hawk’s Pro Skateboarding (Activision) Actually, probably my favourite game on N-Gage, even if Sonic is a more worthy title. I don’t see why they ported this and not it’s superior sequel, but that doesn’t affect the fact that Tony Hawk is still a superb game. Using the keypad is clunky and inefficient, but after a while with it I was still managing some great trick combinations. But then, I’ve put far, far too many hours into this game already. If I got it free, a 2-minute run on the train is something I’d find it hard not to succumb to.
Pandemonium (Crystal Dynamics) This game was horrible when it was originally released. A pixel perfect port of it… ON A PHONE! Doesn’t make it any less awful.
Red Faction (Monkeystone) I can’t be sure, but despite the hype of the N-Gage offering full 3d, I’m fairly sure this uses the sort of ‘pseudo-3d’ which was used in titles such as LucasArts' Dark Forces. As a port of Red Faction it fails miserably. As a game in it’s own right… It fails miserably. The level design is illogical, the graphics dull, the combat uninteresting, and the enemies suicidally stupid. After playing it, I also felt suicidally stupid. Poor John Romero.
Conclusion
The N-Gage is currently just not worth it as a games machine. While support from EA is coming by Christmas, at launch, the N-Gage is not an attractive prospect. My advice? It would be to buy a Nokia 3300, considering it's out now, cuter, and the only things it doesn’t offer are series 60 or N-Gage games.
But interestingly, outside of Europe the 3300 offers a QWERTY keyboard rather than the N-Gage design I see in high street stores. It could be possible that Nokia actually feel more threatened by themselves than they’d admit. That still shouldn’t make the N-Gage any more attractive to the US consumer, I think. But it’s left them in a very unenviable position – as it stands, on release, the N-Gage will be the only mobile phone available on which you can play any game on with anything even nearly approaching the correct control layout. And if you’re desperate, then $299 might be worth the price. But you’ll just encourage them…
[next: NVIDIA - Vodaphone, ECTS Awards]
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